another one bites the dust

fuck off 2014, you absolute bellend

well it's that time of year again when we're drowned in "new year new me" statuses and tweets. for some, it's exhausting but for others, it's quite nice to see friends so happy and determined/motivated. i'm over the moon to see how well 2014 treated a lot of you and equally as upset about how fucking tragic it was for some others. but it's done now. no point crying over spilt milk. let's just leave it in the past and then keep our heads held high, ready for 2015.

we don't take nothing from nobody

remember when i had hair?

it's just dawned on me that i will have written exactly 150 posts by the time 2014 is over. hang on now. that is a whole lot of fuckery that you've absorbed over the past 5 months and that's a whole lot of fuckery that i've e-pooed out and forced down your throats. oh god, what's happening here? let's save the emotional talk and faecal metaphors for tomorrow's "oh jesus it's nearly the new year" post. instead i want to talk to you about five feet of sheer joy that i've been lucky enough to have in my life for the best part of 8 years.

it's people like you that make the world go 'round

monday cuddles with this bear

and just like that, my bad mood is no more. turns out going shopping really does help with "s.a.d" and i encourage all of you to brave the shops now because town wasn't as apocalyptic as it's been over the past few days (granted i've just been for two hours in 1 degree heat at 5pm but that's by the by). there were a few lovely things that happened during my session today which i want to share with you because it might instil you with some faith in the world. if you already have faith, what are you doing on this blog???!!?!

wanna do something that makes me crazy

owls are SO in right now

THE CHRISTMAS COMEDOWN STRUGGLE IS REAL. i think it's safe to say that the festivities are very much over and that means we need something new to focus on to keep us going. there's new years which is always overrated and underwhelming so let's be realistic and think about something else which is great. like free stuff. and love. or better yet, maybe both? that's right it's time for an overdue and under-appreciated "oh mitch please!" giveaway!!!!!!!!

in the mall thuggin', buggin', spent a few hundred

post sales meltdown SO MUCH CHEEK

silly me thinking that the world would've calmed down after christmas and boxing day. i thought i would brave the outside world and have a quiet, casual look at what deals were on offer in the shops to buy with my christmas money (because i have around 18p in my account so online shopping i.e MY FAVOURITE MIND was out of the question). as it turns out, i ended up cowering in boots' feminine care aisle for fear of being trampled and killed. but that's by the by, i still bought shit of course. 

nobody loved me like you

thanks mum xo 

well look at that, christmas is over for another year and we're all feeling a bit fatter and probably depressed that our next break is a year away. but we've still got a while until the new year so let's make the most of what we've got. i, for one, had a fucking lovely christmas - spent it, as always, with my family, seeing a few special people amidst my mum's hitler regime for the day. one of those special people is someone you may or may not know so it's time to get everything off my chest before 2015.

IT'S CHRIIIIIISTMAAAAAS

can jew believe how awkward we made this?

now get the fuck off of my blog and spend some quality time with your friends and family xo

one more sleep

thank you nursery xo

that's right. christmas eve is finally here so we all know what tomorrow brings!!!?! awkward conversation, unrealistic expectations, underwhelming gifts and oversized jumpers lol jk i think it brings the break we all really need. i was lucky enough to score a half day at work today and, even though i took down all the decorations ready for our 2015 return, it was a nice end to my year there. but now i'm home with a nap under my belt, things are all a bit different.

i'll never feel you if i don't tell you

thank you verity xo

there's a mere three and a half hours standing in between me and a week of festive freedom now! yes, i'm into day four of this hangover now. yes, i'm drained in every way, shape and form. yes, i've listened to "underneath the tree" too many times for it to sound even vaguely christmassy anymore. but fuck all of that, spirits are still high even if my excitement for christmas day isn't. i'm going to drink this soya hot chocolate, watch home alone 2 and think about all the things i won't be doing until january 2nd.

it's you that's keeping me alive

what a goddess xo

hey you'll never guess what? i'm still hungover like a motherfucker and i went back to work today to face up to the harsh realities of just how much of a class a prick i was on friday. but, as it turns out, a) i wasn't that bad and b) my lowlights were only in front of lauren who i now love more than ever. so if you're thinking about pulling a sicky because you're embarrassed about talking to the nursery dad you flirted with, just shut the fuck up and go in because he'll probably be too ashamed to send his kid there anymore.