start over

such a wise calendar

we made it. happy 2015 mothafuckaz. i don't know about you but it was lovely to see the wanker of a year out with my favourite people last night - we had a weird four way kiss at midnight and saw in this new year with some questionable singing and dancing. either way, i'm here today to talk to you about something sort of serious but, after all, this is "oh, mitch please!" so it's probably not going to be anything too drastic really is it?

"what the fuck are you on about?"

it's 2015 and what better time to make a new start than...well, the start of a new year. i never used to be a "new year new me" kind of person but after 2014 gave me a few too many chinese burns (oh god, that's probably not very PC is it) i want to make a conscious effort to change my life in 2015. new years resolutions are a farce but i've got two big things which i am writing down and immortalising so i "have" to keep to them. 

numero uno - make more effort with the people i love and thus, in turn, spend more time with them. i hate people, that's no secret (sorry everyone xo) but i feel like i distanced myself from people more than ever last year. granted there were a few reasons why and i didn't really miss the overt interactions but i can see just what a toll it's had on my relationships. even spending time with my cousins on christmas day made me realise just how much of a hermit i've become and that's not okay - those guys were my best friends all through my childhood and now i see them twice a year and it's like we're strangers. i've got friends close by and far away who i need to invest a lot more time and energy into and, even though it's something which doesn't come naturally to me and goes against every fibre of my introverted being, i'm more than determined to make it work. 

and then here's b. it's a bittersweet one and something which i've crossed by absolutely none of you because i wanted to get it all out in one chunk without fear of it being diluted or changed. i want to blog less. a lot less. i fucking love it here, i love coming home and writing little anecdotes about my day and getting you guys involved and writing letters and sending lovely little things and hearing what you've got to say about life. but it's starting to get in the way. i always loved the thought of being very "e-active" because i interact with people in a really lazy, safe way. but it's becoming a chore now. i can feel my tone changing into something all too self-absorbed, bordering self-righteous and i've realised that living the boring life of a 23 year old man doesn't always offer up a lot of excitement to write about later on. i find myself worrying about my plans and even cancelling to make sure i can get back here and write to you guys. 

that's not to say i don't appreciate your support because HEAVEN KNOWS i truly and honestly do. but after 150 days of solid typing, and a third of a year spent thinking about how i'm going to change my life, i feel like it's time for me to reel it back in and make the conscious effort to start working on my life off of the screen and behind the blog. i want to go out more, i want to spend time with my boyfriend, i want to visit friends in other cities: i want to compile a few hearty posts each week rather than clutching at straws and taking pictures of mugs to bulk it out. i want you guys to feel stimulated (steady on) and actually interested in the things i'm writing about rather than just "liking" a post because it's about willies. this blog has been a perfect stepping stone to sorting my life out and now, on the 1st of january, i feel like i'm ready to say "thank you very much, let's cool off a bit".

it's not goodbye, i don't know if i'll ever feel ready enough for that given how much of tragedy is immortalised here. but it's the start of a new chapter: one which i'm so excited to share with you xo