& i know it's gunna be a lovely day

these cost £2.20, thanks ebay

spread the word: today was a good day! aside from my imaginary ovaries aching in some kind of sympathy period pain for one of the babes i work with, it was actually alright. i got shit done, i was in good spirits and i've come home to new shoes so what more could i need? me me me that's enough of that. it got me (sorry) thinking about the bigger picture and in particular other people who are going through all kind of madness and still maintain a positive frame of mind.

it's time guys. sorry in advance "oh fucking hell, it's emo hour"

the king emo of my tattoos, "in medias res", quite literally means in the midst of things and it reminds me on a daily basis that everyone has their baggage, everybody has their troubles which they deal with in their own way. maybe they're happy in themselves, maybe they're seeking help or maybe they're down and out: it doesn't matter. the fact is we don't know the half of it. it's easy to make a snap judgement about someone based on how they're behaving. but have you ever thought that that person might just be struggling and crying out for help? after being the one to make those harsh judgements, it's eye-opening to finally be on the other side of them and, truth be told, it's cutting.

could go either way, couldn't it?

i've spent a long time being really disappointed in the human race. i don't want to get into it all over again and dampen this rare mood but i think we are pretty awful: selfish, jealous, insecure, power hungry, twisted and a little bit insane. maybe it's true, maybe it's me. again it doesn't matter because, every so often, you come across people who aren't gigantic bellends. and it makes you feel okay. in fact, it can make you feel hopeful. a friend of my dad's in work must've used his perfectly honed gaydar and sensed that i was feeling pretty gloomy because he gave my dad this book to give to me. again, it might be a crock of shit - i won't know until i read it. but what i do know is this guy, a stranger, cares about people so much that he's willing to try and help somebody he has never even met. what a bloke. (if you're reading this chris, thank you so much) 

thanks shabz xo

take what you want from this. be it that people really are awful and me being this emotional has only offered up more evidence that humans are weak and paranoid and insignificant. or maybe, just maybe, you might think that some of us are actually alright. maybe your colleague gave you a postcard that says "think happy thoughts" on it. maybe your friend text you about a gig you two could go to. and remember, a lot of the time, it's not what people say but what they don't say HOW AMBIGUOUS.

right enough of that, come on now "what the fuck is that song?"

in honour of said friend texting about a gig, today's song come from bayside who are, quite frankly, one of my ultimate favourites. a far cry from emotionally damaged british females, these angry americans are very good in a different kind of way. they found their signature sound (a while ago) but it still doesn't sound dated: every song is a fucking stormer. and so i present to you "devotion and desire" which goes out to that special someone who broke your heart. you didn't think i could make it through a whole post being positive, did you? oh petal, you must be new here xo